A Matter of Degrees

“Nothing!” Doctor Geisteskrank threw the alembic across the room. “Truly, this must be my greatest moment of failure yet!”

“What about the crossbred gerbil-cobras?” said Bartlett, heading for the broom closet.

“Feistier than intended, yes, but-“

“Or that perpetual motion machine that you hooked up to your blender?”

“Probably nearing the Earth’s core, admittedly-“

“The time you built a robot powered by human despair!” said Bartlett. “No way that could go wrong, right?”

“It was such a ubiquitous power source! At least those projects did something, even if it was not intended.”

“You fail a lot, is all I’m saying.”