Changelings

TO: ALL STAFF
RE: Protocol Updates

All right, everyone. I know we’re still adjusting to the recent staffing changes, but I want it made absolutely clear that “pranks” and “hazing” are to stop immediately. This means:

- No more iron shavings on the toilet seats.
- No more “Church bells” ringtones
- Shirts are to be worn right-side-out

This also goes for our new staff. If I hear one more report of someone going off to the restroom and not coming back until dawn, or another attempted drowning in the breakroom sink, there will be consequences.

Remember: Teamwork and Trust!