Externalities

He stood with his foot upon the cashier’s neck as he emptied the register drawer into a valise.  “Oh, you moral vagrant, you wastrel, you miscreant,” he chided, “to permit this theft.”

He stepped outside and encountered a slender woman of middle years, whom he grasped and osculated forcefully.  “Thou strumpet,” he said, pinning her hands, “to carry on so with a man so much your junior, and a stranger unto you as well.”

When the police arrived, all flashing lights and megaphones, he held his pistol to his own head.  “What?” he cried, “Would you be murderers as well?”