They've Heard All the Nut Jokes Already

The clerk of the court removed her glasses and pinched the bridge of her nose. "I don't think we can issue a marriage license."

"Because we're gay?" Girt demanded, his normally squeaky voice becoming nearly inaudible in his outrage.

"No."

"It's because we're different races, isn't it?" Tutt narrowed his eyes up at the clerk.

She shook her head. "No. It's actually nice that you've overcome your differences as invasive and native species."

"Then what!?"

"Well, you're squirrels. Human laws don't apply. You can do whatever you want, really." The clerk shrugged.

Girt slugged Tutt on the shoulder. "Told you."