Appointment Calendar

“We’re running behind today,” the receptionist told me.  “The doctor will be with you as soon as he can.  You can wait over there.”  She gestured in the vague direction of the faux-leather couches and the elderly magazines.  I settled in the wooden chair, as the couch was occupied by a nine-hundred-pound grizzly bear, who was gnawing the armrest philosophically.

“So, what are you in for?” I asked jovially.

“He’s eating the doctor at two-thirty,” the receptionist interjected.

“But my appointment is for three,” I protested.

“Tough cookies,” she snapped.  “We can reschedule if you like.”

“Gnarrr,” said the bear.

The Branches Creaking Ominously Underneath Me

It's amazing that we're both here, when you think about it.  These sort of temporary islands, where enough flotsam accumulates to make a little shelter, and it all hangs together long enough to accumulate dirt and grow plants, well, they're relatively rare.  And for them to be colonized by animals is even rarer.  At most, you get insects, perhaps a bird or two.  Maybe a turtle.  But mammals?  Not a chance.  To find two mammals, well, you have to admit: that's verging on the miraculous.

That one of the two is a bear is, I think, simply evidence of divine sadism.

Natural Enemies

Deimos lumbered through the scrubby trees at the edge of the forest. Private Erdos and Parker, the handler, followed in Deimos’ wake. The bear shouldered his way through the trees, well over a thousand pounds of ursine flesh, not counting the gleaming metallic implants.

“He’s found something,” said Parker. “Can’t be salmon this far inland.”

“Salmon? He gets distracted when he’s hungry?” Erdos had never wanted the liaison position.

Parker shot Erdos a look. “No. The salmon are the advance scouts for the dolphins. They’re afraid of bears when they go in streams, but the dolphins can find them anywhere.”

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For reference.

Further reference.